Is Something Going On Today?

Happy Election Day!

I've voted! Only about a 35 minute wait at 7am this morning. Usually there is no wait at my polling place but I figure it wasn't too bad and I am glad to see a big turnout. As I was waiting, I knit a few inches of another square for the Pine Street Inn Knit-A-Thon. Really, how do people manage waiting in lines without knitting? I do miss the old school voting booths with the curtains, I remember going in them with my mom as a kid and her letting me move the levers.

My feeling on voting on this, you don't vote - you don't get to complain. And we all know I love bitching too much to give up that right. Of course there is no complaining in Sarahland since I am a benevolent dictator and treat my citizens quite well. Well, unless they spit but then they deserve my wrath.

Outside of Sarahland everyone is pretty worked up about this election but I don't think I can sit through a whole night of talking heads with their maps, screens, polls and predictions.... I think I may have to program my own alternative Election Night tv viewing. I am thinking maybe some Pinky and The Brain, a quest for power at its most pure - narf! Then followed with a bit of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. And since I love theme meals I think I may have to go with some all-American comfort food for dinner, chicken and dumplin's.

I figure at this point you have all been told to vote by a gazillion different people and things so you don't need me telling you too. And if you're not in the US y'all are probably so sick of us and this incredibly loooooong process. But I will tell you that Starbucks is giving out free coffee if you vote and Ben & Jerry's free ice cream. So if the democratic process isn't a good enough reason for you then free eats should be.

The Barge

In my family I have to say that we love us some pop culture. I love that my Entertainment Weekly is waiting for me in the mailbox every Friday evening and it is fully read and in the recycling bag long before I go to work on Monday.


I am the one that my mom calls to ask, "I watched a tv show and there's this guy who looks familiar and I think he was in a show with that other guy and maybe they were cops or lawyers and the theme was really catchy? Ya know who I'm talking about, right? " And usually after a few questions to narrow things down, What network? What night? Reruns? What decade? I probably do know who she's talking about. I love the challenge of a difficult Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon and there is probably way too many of my brain cells used up by knowing the names of made-for-tv- movies starring Tori Spelling. (The classic being "Mother May I Sleep With Danger?) I love to hear the details of upcoming projects from Joss Whedon or J.J. Abrams. And if you are unsure of who those last 2 guys are, you will be a quite lost (hint, hint) in a conversation between me and my brother-in-law. And in those conversations it is not unusual to hear the phrase, "They are so on the barge!"


Ah, The Barge. The barge came about many years ago when there was a news story about a trash barge that was just sailing up and down the east coast because no city would let it into port and dump it's trash in their landfill. So somehow I decided that I would have a barge for those famous people that I just bug me and want them to just be floating around out there out of my way.



Most people come and go off my barge as need warrants; some are obvious - Ben Affleck was there during the age of "Bennifer", Paris Hilton when she went to jail thing or Donald Trump anytime he randomly insults Rosie O'Donnell. Really on any given day the passengers change. But there are some permanent fixtures....

• Martha Stewart -her voice just drives me crazy and she's so condescending! I like to think she's happy passing out hordes d'oeuvre's to the other passengers.
• Sharon Stone - really why is she so respected as an actress? She has made far more many crappy movies than good ones (Casino). I just can't understand it so on the barge she goes.
• Meryl Streep - before you yell at me, I just can't seem to get past the whole Kramer vs. Kramer character and the fact that she's "the greatest actress of our time" and can do a lot of accents will not change my mind. It's my barge and she's on it.

That is the thing about the barge, each person's is theirs and theirs alone. So while my sister's includes Adam Sandler (he just bugs her), mine doesn't. There are only two rules of the barge....Rule 1, don't criticize someone else's choices. Rule 2, the barges are non-violent. You can't blow them up or stage a celebrity deathmatch. I had to create this rule for my dad who kept wanting to take a bazooka to his.

So is there some celebrity who just makes you nuts for no apparent reason. Put them on your barge.

Rules of Sarahland - Part I

One of the problems with New England winters is the lack of sunlight. These days I get up when it is still pretty gray and get home when it is dark- very dark , which happens around 3:30. Well, maybe not but it feels like it. I have found that my picture taking has suffered because of the darkness since my apartment is apparently very poorly lit. Soooo, I have no pictures to offer up to the blog gods and therefore tend to put off posting altogether. So this will be an all word post, those of you who need pictures please feel free to doodle along and submit your drawings.

Last night at SnB (that's Stitch n Bitch for you, Meg)the rules of Sarahland came up and someone actually wanted to know what they are. Beware of what you ask for! I can't really remember them all right now and new things are always likely to rile me up, which is why this is Part I. Here we go with more proof why the men in white coats are going to take me away.

BTW, Rule #1 is always Rule #1 but the rest are in no particular order.



By Decree of your Benevolent Dictator, I declare these the rules of Sarahland


1. No Public Spitting - Ew! Must I really explain this?

No hotcupping - see rant for punishment


No ear piecing for children under the age of 2. - I just don't like it.

No fruit in/on bagels. I was tempted to only allow the following bagels be served at all in Sarahland: plain, onion, garlic, salt, poppy seed and everything, but I figured I'd be a kind ruler and realize that maybe not everyone was raised by nutty New York Jews. But after a co-worker was trying to explain the virtue of an Au Bon Pain blueberry bagel with strawberry cream cheese I was forced to make the no-fruit rule. I mean he's from Kansas for pete's sakes! What does he know about bagels! Punishment to come - probably will involve sisal rye seeds and gefilte fish.

No male over the age of 16 will wear their baseball cap backwards unless they are a baseball catcher. Special dispensations may be granted for moving days, room/house painting. Related sub-rule: no one over the age of 5 can wear a baseball cap sideways. Really, you just look like an idiot.