Cute as a Button

I'm having one of those bad days at work. One of those days where I put on my MP3 player and listen to the Dixie Chicks "Not Ready to Make Nice", over and over and over. So to offset the annoyance and frustration I am feeling I will post my little sillies I've been working on.

Next month my sister and I are headed back to Art & Soul a.ka.a "Craft Camp" for the second year. One of the things that people do at A&S is bring trades to well, duh, trade with people. They can be anything from ATC's (Artist Trading Cards), charms, necklaces, beads whatever. Last year I made shrinky dinks charms and magnets which some people enjoyed, others looked down on (well just one woman who refused to trade with me - bitch.) And my leftover trades made their way to the very appreciative hands of my SnB'ers. My sister made totally cute paper dolls made of recycled boxes.

At one point I thought of knitting teeny sweaters but to be honest that was just going to take more time than I have so I went with the cute but easy project of fabric covered button magnets. I came across the tutorial and handy, dandy online supply store jcaroline creative. I swear she makes me want to go trolling thrift stores just looking for chairs to re-cover.

If these magnets get scoffed at some of y'all may be getting little treats at SnB meetings in mid-May.

The Bastards

So I managed to travel to and from Albany without having to complain about my company to any major degree. In fact the people I met with there were great and I was glad to finally meet them in person.

But then I get back to the office and as I am doing some blog reading I am noticing that pictures don't seem to be appearing on a few of the blogs. Not all, just some. Then I am on Ravelry and I notice none of my pictures are appearing. Hmmmmm.... I click on Flickr. And I get a big message saying this is a Forbidden Site. Wahhhh!!! Not only can't I get onto that site but any picture from that site is blocked. In the case of ravelry that is ALL of the pictures. Is it just Flickr? I click onto Snapfish - blocked.

I am now going to be forced to do my ravelry browsing and blog reading at home! How will I fill the hours of boredom I have at my office? When I have horrible days at work I usually look at a few Michelle photos (my niece) to make me smile. Now I can't. I am sad - so very, very sad. Trust me, I am pouting.

The only bright spot of today is that I an evening with my SnB'ers and some margaritas to look forward to that may take away some of the pain.

Scariest part of this is the realization that this may be the thing that truly motivates me to take action and get serious about looking for a new job. How screwy is that?

Is It Fall Yet?

I was forced to miss Stitch n'Bitch last week because of a business trip to Philadelphia. Trust me as the bumper stickers say "I'd rather be knitting".

It wasn't really that bad, I would to have liked to see the city itself but there really was no time for sightseeing. And my boss was far more interested in watching baseball in the hotel sports bar than venture downtown for a decent meal. My boss is not one to understand that I would much rather be in my hotel room reading Crazy Aunt Purl's book and ordering room service than in a amazingly loud sports bar watching a team I care nothing about. So I feigned a headache and escaped to enjoy my book. I really liked CAP's book but I also find a lot of my neurotic-self in her blog so I am not surprised. Not so much a knitting book as a memoir but very moving and inspiring and hilarious.

I finished up my Danica scarf last week but as it's been either freakishly 85 degrees or raining (neither a good thing for wool)I have not had a chance to wear it outside yet. I love the way it turned out, the Patons SWS seemed to know to change colors perfectly aligned with the squares. And how kick-ass does my first try at entrelac look? Okay, I'm bragging, but I've been around Grandma "Look at my beautiful sweaters!" Harriet this weekend.

Note to self: next project less picking up stitches. I am not a fan of having to pick up many, many stitches.

Are you Smarter than a Fourth Grader?

A co-worker in my department has a son in the fourth grade who gets these weekly math challenges. I must say for a fourth grader are pretty hard. Usually they are solved with algebra (which they have not learned yet) but the kids are challenged to try to figure it out anyway they can graphs, guessing, pictures etc...Now my co-worker gives these word problems to several of us in the department to work out. Usually it takes me a few minutes to kick out my basic algebra skills and figure it out.

The first time we did it, my co-worker couldn't solve it herself but insisted that my answer had to be wrong because I did it too fast because apparently the rest of my department took over a half hour to solve it (their answers were wrong by the way).

The second time I was critiqued for not showing all of my work . We have yet to do one where I haven't had to explain how to get the correct answer to at least one person.

I know I sound really bitchy and condescending. I fully acknowledge that not everyone is good at math and I'm totally okay with that there are lots of things I can't remember from school. The thing is all of these people work in my department - the ACCOUNTING DEPARTMENT!!! They are paid to work with numbers all day and should not look at me oddly because I remember how to do simple algebra!!!

So here's the problem. Feel free to post your answers in the comments.

A magic money box doubles any money put into it and then adds $1. Kara put some money in the box and the box did its magic. She then took this new amount of money and put it back in the box again. After the box did its magic again, Kara took of $31. How much money did Kara originally put into the magic money box?

It's that time of year again!

Bust out your crockpots and Velveeta it's time for my office's Cinco de Maio celebration!!!!

Since May 5th is on a Saturday you're assuming it would be on Friday the 4th then? Oh no, that would only make sense. It is today Thursday the 3rd. Why? Who knows? It's always on Thursday. This tradition led to one of my favorite work quotes ever when I overheard this gem last year.

"Wait, since we're celebrating on the 4th shouldn't we be calling it Cinco de Quattro?"

So as with all of my office functions (including our holiday party) it's a potluck. Unfortunatly whoever made the scrumptous treat made of Velveeta and ground beef called "Monkey Brains" in the past did not make it this year. Mmmmm......Monkey Brains

Last year's big highlight was the chili contest. But wait, you say that chili is Southwestern and not Mexican? Ha! Mexico, New Mexico same difference. This year "Mexican food" apparently means anything spicy. Macaroni n' cheese with jalepenos throw in, jerk pork, jambalya and rice (Cajun-Mexican same diff).

I have to say my favorite things this year were the items not made. Crush Boy stops by my desk yesterday and says "How's this sound for the potluck? Some ground beef, browned and then put inside jello? Red jello of course, like salsa." I say that all that's missing is the grain alcohol and we've got a party!! Clearly he is kidding so there no Beef Jello shots to be found. But the brillant co-workers in my department do not understand sarcasm.

T: Crush Boy has made Slim Jim Stew for lunch.
Me: Huh?
T: He put Slim Jims in a crockpot with boiling water and now those guys are all making fun of it. Ask him about it!

A little later....

Me: So what did you make? I heard something about Slim Jims?
Crush Boy: I took Slim Jims put them in a crockpot of water added cheese and some spices.
Me: So has anyone actually eaten any of this?
CB: Well, no since I didn't actually make it. But I've got all of them convinced that I did (nods his head toward my department). Slim Jim Stew. Ha!

I swear if I wasn't crushing on this boy before I so would now. The fact that he has them convinced he would make something so vile and be proud of it is awesome. I pretty much didn't believe early on. I am not seeing this 20-something, barely-cooks, brings Ramen noodles in for lunch, guy actually owning a crock pot.

Felice Navidad! And have a happy and healthy Cinco de Tres!

How do I respond to this?

This is one of those work stories that I would normally call me sister with in the middle of the workday to ask her if I am in bizarro world again. But since her clan is down in Orlando visiting Mickey Mouse...who we kidding, she's going to see Princesses. If Mickey or Eeyore happen to walk by that's a bonus but all my niece really wants to see are Princesses. So Marsy's loss is your gain and I really need to get this out of my head or it may bounce around in there all weekend like a pinball machine. And since I recently told new people about my blog other people besides my sister may actually read this. Feel free to comment. Really! I am a big ol' comment whore and as you see have so very few....sniff, sniff.

Since we are all having performance evaluations the talk of jobs and satisfaction is all floating around my department. So I'm talking with Coworker T and the conversation includes this...

Coworker T: I love my job. Do you?

Me: I like it but I don't love it. (Sidenote: to say I like it is being very generous but I digress...) What is it exactly that you love about it?

T: I like doing the mailroom and helping on the phones.

Me: But you work in accounts payable, you do the mail room for like a half hour a day and you fill in on the phones may once a month at most?

T: Well, I like when I can do nothing.

Me: Uhhhh.....okay.

That pretty much sums it up. She should be quoted on one of those motivational posters with a sunrise. Just so wrong.

Can't wait until my evaluation on Monday when I most likely will get in trouble again for doing my work too fast and looking for more things to do.

They Said What???

"Read? I don't read. My brain works too fast for me to read." - L.

As told to me by a co-worker when asked about book groups. Boy, am I glad to be slow-brained.

There was a little girl with a little curl...

I came in this morning with my haircut, a good haircut, a shorter by like 6 inches haircut. And do I get any acknowlegement at all....uh no. Either they are clueless or they are doing the stare at me for a good half a minute but then they don't say anything at all. I must remember that most of them have very little taste, if any, and that I don't need their approval but it would be nice for someone to even notice it happened even if they don't like it! But apparently in bizarro world that just doesn't happen.

So in conclusion - they suck.

Thrown for a Fruit Loop

So I'm in the kitchen at work rinsing off blueberries for breakfast and I'm chatting with a co-worker and in the course of this conversation she says "Can I try one? I've never had one like this before." Yes, I have to admit I was somewhat horrified that someone had never eaten a fresh blueberry before only in muffin form. This is someone from Boston! It's not like the Maine blueberries have a far way to travel! Then she says she only likes bumpy berries - meaning rasberries or blackberries she's not sure which. This is why rickets is coming back! (I think rickets is the new scurvy).

It's okay, I'm good now....then I started thinking that someone could then think the same about me (horrors!) since there are lots of fruits and veggies I've never had or say I don't like even though I haven't tried them again as an adult. So I decided that I am going to work this year to try every fruit and veggie that I normally don't eat. I figure with Haymarket and the 88 at my disposal I can end up trying some really weird stuff.

Bon Appetit!